The Ugly Truth- Parties

Ahhh, parties!  The essence of our youth.  The memories we will share with our grandchildren.  The moments we make with our best friends.  It’s all at parties!  But to be honest, parties are the reason that teenagers have such a bad rep with most adults.  They think we’re reckless, ignorant, hooligans, rebellious when we party.  And that might be true for some of us.  But for the rest of us, parties are a place for us to be ourselves.  Parties allow us to get lost in our everyday’s life and just let go.  When you’re surrounded by others having fun, you tend to have fun as well.  Rather your definition of a party is a house party, homecoming dances, Netflix night in with friends, a study group, hotel party, pool party, and etc.  Whatever your party may be, we all can’t help but crave that feeling that they give us.  I asked 3 guys and 3 girls questions they have about parties and this is what I got.

Female, 39.

1). Why do teenagers experiment with first times (drugs, sex, etc) at parties? Why do teenagers have to be around friends?

This is an easy question.  Peer pressure.  If it’s not peer pressure, then it’s the fact that a teengaer might feel more comfortable at a party to explore new things, when there are other teenagers there doing that same thing.  I hope that makes sense.  For example, if I have never drunk alcohol before and I wanted to, I would feel more comfortable at a party to try it because other’s at the party are doing it.  It would actually justify it.  I would think if others are drinking, why can’t I?  Now I don’t agree with this thought process but this is what goes on in the mind of an average teenager at a party.  To answer the second question, teenagers want to try new things around their friends because it helps them gain confidence.  When their friends build them up, it makes the situation seem less intimidating.

Male, 16.

2). Why do people feel the need to drink at parties?

To begin, not everyone feels the need to drink at parties.  But for the people that do, there are many factors that contribute to this need.  One is peer pressure.  Two is curiosity.  Three is to experience the high that liquor provides.  Four is that people think they can’t have fun without being drunk.  The first reason is self explanatory.  You’re at a party and all your friends are drinking and they hand you a cup and tell you to try it.  “Come on, it’s not that bad!”  “Everyone else is drinking!”  When your friends are making you seem less then cool because you won’t do something, you tend to want to do it more.  Now, for people like me, I would only drink at a party if I was curious as to what the big deal was with liquor.  Simply curiosity Then there are the people who are alcoholics and genuinely crave the high that liquor gives them.  And lastly there are the people that probably hate drinking but feel that if they aren’t drunk then they can’t have fun.

Female, 16.

3). Why do guys expect girls to twerk on them at parties?

This is honestly a question I ask myself at every party I go to.  I mean, I know this isn’t the early 20’s where at parties we all dance the waltz in the middle of the dance floor but come on!  Almost all the guys of this generation do no dance at all!  Girls do all the work.  And you want to know why guys expect us to do all the dancing?  It’s because this is the standard we set for ourselves.  I don’t want to go on a rampage about why twerking should stop, but honestly, it’s just become a new way for men to degrade women.  Plus, it’s another way of girls competing with each other!  Now, twerking can be fun, playful, and can be done with your with your boyfriend but to twerk on strangers and twerk to get attention is really becoming a thing now and it’s saddening.

Male, 32.

4). Why do teenagers feel that they have to lie to their parents about parties?

Yep, we’ve all been there.  “No, her mom will totally be there.”  “No, no boys are coming mom!”  “Yes, we’re leaving the party at 8 and going straight to sleep.”  I mean the answer is obvious, we lie because, if we don’t, then we won’t be allowed to go to the party.  Some things parents just take way too seriously.  I know they’re trying to protect us but sometimes there is nothing we need protection from.   I hated when my mom asked if boys would be at the party because boys are not some different species.  I had plenty of friends that were boys!  And I would miss out on a lot of activities if there would be boys present.  But there are instances where my mom has kept me out of trouble, I’m not saying we shouldn’t listen to our parents.  But sometimes they just go overboard and that is why we lie, so that they don’t worry.

Female, 17.

5). How do you know if you’ve thrown a good party?

If you’re still hearing stories from your party, days after it happened, then you threw a good party.  If people are on social media, talking about your party, then it was a good party.  If you have music, snacks, and/or movies, let’s just be honest, that’s a good party.  This truly depends on the person you ask and their personal experience but if the majority of the people seem to be enjoying themselves then it’s a good party.

Male, 16.

6). Do you believe a party is a good place to find a girlfriend?

Honestly, I do.  Parties are actually a good place to meet friends and a potential girlfriend/boyfriend.  This is because everyone at the party was invited by someone.  So at least one person in that room can tell you about the potential friend/girlfriend/boyfriend.  It’s basically like they have an alibi for whatever they tell you.  If one of my girlfriends want to talk to one of my friends that’s a guy, I would be able to tell her if he was a jerk, a cool guy, or maybe just weird.  Plus, parties tend to bring out the fun, happy, and exciting side of people.  So when you’re at a party, you’re fun side is always showing and that increases the number of people that might be interested in you.

Last piece of friendly advice for everyone is just to be responsible and safe at parties.  There are good and bad things that occur at parties but as long as you’re safe, respectable, and ready for a fun time, you should have a wonderful experience.

Love & All,

Rosy

Disclaimer: Teen Culture holds no rights to the Photos in this post.

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