We’ve all had our personal share of horrendous heartbreaks, lovey-dovey make-ups, and playful flirting. And we’ve all had our share of questions about this thing called love. “Why isn’t he into me?” “Why is she so clingy?” “What should I get her for Valentine’s Day?” I might not be an expert on relationships and a lot of you might not agree with what I say, but I guarantee I will use personal experiences, use the little expertise I do have, and keep it real. So I asked 3 males and 3 females, what questions they have about the opposite sex and what questions they have about relationships and this is what I got!
1). Why do guys always have to text first?
To be honest, I disagree with this question, especially when the guy and the girl are already in a relationship. I think that a relationship should be a partnership, so a girl should surprise her boyfriend with good morning messages sometimes as well. But to the contrary, when a boy and a girl are in that playful flirtatious phase I think boys should text first more often, not all the time, but more often. This shows the girl that you are thinking about her and it makes her feel special that you took the time to text her first. But if you really want to impress a girl, text her back quickly. This shows her you not only are thinking about her but that you’re enjoying the conversation.
2). Where does cheating get you?
Absolutely nowhere! I live by the saying, ‘If you want to act single, then be single!’ Cheating is one of the most selfish things a person could do. But the thing is, boys love to experiment and love to try new things. It’s almost in their nature to want to be with more than one girl, of course they’re not supposed to act on this desire. Boys want the perfect woman and so they tend to cheat with a girl the complete opposite of you. Then he has you and he has her, and together you two make the perfect woman. But guess what? Once the girls find out he’s cheating, which they always do, he’ll have no girl!
3). Why is it so hard for people to commit?
Fear. Fear of being cheated on. Fear of not being satisfied. Fear of ruining a friendship. Fear of them not being able to stay faithful. Sometimes, fear of someone better coming along. It all comes down to fear from previous experiences. So usually, it isn’t you that’s making them question committing, it’s simply fear of what will happen. Also, sometimes people just don’t want a relationship because they’re focused on other stuff. Their career, school, hobbies, etc. So don’t take it too personally love.
4). Why do guys of this generation pressure girls to have sex?
I know this seems like this is all guys but it’s honestly not ALL guys. I’m not a guy, but from my perspective it’s all from media and peer pressure. Guys love competition and love their egos. Bad combination when it comes to peer pressure. A direct quote from one previous guy I dated is that ‘My friends always told me I was missing out and that I’m lame because I hadn’t had sex yet.’ As you can see guys have this mind set that sex is mandatory and without it, then they’re missing out on something important. Then there is media which show sex as this big grand romantic gesture. They make it seem as though you can’t be in love without sex. So some guys see sex as a necessity for being in love! Is sex a gesture to show your love? Yes it is. Is sex the only way to show your love? No guys, it is not! Guys will always want sex from you, it’s your choice on rather not you give it to him ladies.
5). Why are girls so controlling and spoiled?
Let me start off by saying not all of us are controlling and I can’t answer for all girls but I am controlling though. I think that we are so controlling because boys are so spontaneous and we don’t ever know what’s going through your minds so we feel that being controlling can get order in the relationship! Plus we might be controlling but it’s not like you actually do what we say most of the time. And let’s be real guys, every girl loves to be spoiled. But being spoiled doesn’t merely consist of money and gifts, simply being there for her and treating her with respect and loving her can be considered spoiling her. So spoiling her is not always a bad thing.
6). Why do first loves always leave? Why are they hard to forget?
Not all first loves leave. But I believe that some do leave because first loves are so experimental. You have never been in love and neither has he, you don’t know the ropes of love and neither does he! You are jumping head first in love with this guy and you are so naive and let’s be honest, with most first loves come the first heartbreak and I think that’s why they are so hard to forget. And also girls and guys both tend to set their standards on what you expect from relationships based on your first love.
Last piece of friendly advice for everyone out there when it comes to relationships is to always love yourself first. If you don’t love who you are and accept yourself, flaws and all, how can you expect someone else to? Don’t rush relationships. Sometimes you need a little time to get to know yourself.
Love & All,
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